New Hair (and I helped!)

So a few weeks ago after we had Wes's birthday party I was scrolling through the photos and noticed my hair looking particularly horrific after a day of running around and sweating profusely. Evidenced below.

And I thought to myself; self, you've gone too far. I've been growing it out forever and ever now and I think I finally realized that it had reached the point where the length was no longer doing me any favors. I could flat iron it and load it up with as many hair products as I wanted to but my hair is just way too thick and naturally curly to maintain at that length. Sooo, cue a desperate email to my girl, Mary (hair-cutter extraordinaire) and she quickly righted the situation with a few swift snips of the scissors and a few less inches of crazy hair. Ahhhh, things were looking up.

But while I was there we also talked about me trying out her newest genius idea, an at-home hair color treatment. A few months back Mary was out of commission with an injury that left her off her feet and off of work while she took some much needed time to heal and recover. While she was out her clients who regularly have their hair dyed were getting desperate and resorted to grocery store box color. Now, I've never colored my own hair before, I've always left that up to the professionals because 1. I'd always heard how bad it was for your hair (says the lady who flat irons her hair within an inch of its life every single day, go figure.) and 2. I never trusted myself enough to do it on my own with out screwing it up.

But Mary's thought is this, if you dye your hair an all over color, why are you paying someone (her) a bunch of extra money just to apply it to your head when you could easily do it yourself? She trusts us, she really trusts us! So she started offering her clients the option to buy their color from her (the good stuff!) and do it themselves at home.

Um, hello brilliant! I've never heard of another stylist offering this, but it seems like such an obviously great idea I'm not sure HOW no one has thought of it before. All the benefits of professional grade hair color without all the extra cost and time investment. So here's how it works. You make an initial appointment with Mary and you determine what color and what amount will work for your hair.  Only a 15 minute consultation and you're all set! She gives you everything you'll need to do it at home including a shower cap, gloves, little ear covers (or as Mary calls them, Barbie shower caps) and of course step by step instructions on how to do it. It's really not that hard, but if you should happen to forget for instance, how long she told you to leave it on, it's all right there for your reference. And off you go to work your own magic at home for way less money than having her do it at the salon. Also, she keeps this info in your file and from then on out she can just mail out your color to you whenever you want more. You don't even need to go in to the salon at all. Busy ladies rejoice! 

Why am I telling you about this and why am I dedicating an entire blog post to it? Because I honestly think it is a really, really smart idea. And  because in addition to being my friend, Mary is a local, super hardworking mama who gets what it feels like to be short on time and funds. She started this little business as an answer to a void in the marketplace she saw that needed filling and I really want to support her and other awesome, enterprising women just like her. Because that's what this world needs, a lot more women supporting women. Especially those in our own communities who are doing what it takes to keep their small businesses going all on their own. And I also think a lot of you out there might really benefit  from something like this. I mean think about it. You're busy, stressed, tired, you know, the usual, but you just found a bunch of gray hairs or your roots are all grown out, or your hair just feels blah. Of course you really don't feel like finding the time to get to the salon. Wouldn't it be so much easier to just pull that bottle of personalized hair color out of your bathroom cabinet and throw it on after the kids are in bed while you watch Breaking Bad and eat a pint of Ben & Jerry's? That just sounds way more appealing to me than carving a few hours out of my weekend just for a trip to the salon for color maintenance. Plus I tried it out and it's just as wonderful as I thought it would be! It's not too hard to do on your own, even for a first-timer. Although full disclosure, I did have Abby on hand while I was doing it in case things got messy or I panicked and needed assistance. (Plus somebody needed to take the pictures ;). And if you've been dying your hair from a box of color you already have the system down, this is just a way better alternative for healthier hair. And in the end it was really no big deal at all. Totally easy and completely doable. And now I have nice new hair and a pretty dark color for the impending fall season. LOVE IT.

If this sounds like something that might work for you get in touch with Mary and she'll set you right up!

LouLou in Hollywood - call, text or email! All info is on her website, right here!

In Response to Mrs. Hall

I'm sure many of you have seen the recent blog post being shared all over facebook and twitter from a mother of teenage boys addressed to teenage girls. The post is here and reading it will give context to this post if you haven't seen it already. The people sharing this in my feeds (and there have been MANY) are all women, most mothers, and some even mothers to teenage girls. The people sharing this post are my friends and acquaintances and I know and like them all. These people have good hearts and I don't doubt for a second that they only want what's best for their families. However, I wonder what message a post like this is really sending.

The gist of the post is that the author, Mrs. Hall, disapproves of the female friends her boys have on facebook posting sexy photos of themselves. She writes that her family often sits around the dining room table perusing her sons social media feeds and blocking any girl who posts anything she deems too provocative or unworthy of her sons attention.

Look, I get it. It's got to be uncomfortable being a parent to a teenager and knowing they're having all these new thoughts and feelings as those hormones start coursing through their brand new maturing bodies. I wouldn't necessarily like knowing my kid was looking at (and probably enjoying) that sexy selfie taken by the girl from his chemistry class. It's just weird and awkward as a parent, right? But is deleting the girl from their list of facebook friends really the answer? Do we even need an answer? Is there even a problem other than our own parental discomfort with watching our babies grow up and find their sexuality?

You won't find me posing bra-less with an extra-arched back taking duck faced pictures in the bathroom mirror anytime in the future. But I'd like to think I'm not so far removed from that age that I don't remember a time when that would have been appealing. These young teens are new to these bodies of theirs. They're trying to figure out what to do with these new boobs and hips and long legs. It's all a part of growing up. I may not like it if my teenage daughter were to take a picture of herself in her "scantily clad pjs" but I can still understand why she might want to. This is a right of passage. This wanting attention from the opposite sex, this wanting to be noticed. It's nothing new and it's perfectly normal.

And if this is how we treat our girls, why do our boys not get this same treatment? Why did Mrs. Hall find it perfectly acceptable to write an entire scathing post about underdressed girls vying for the attention of innocent boys illustrated with pictures of her own teenage boys, shirtless, soaking wet and doing muscle poses in their bathing suits? No really, those were originally the pictures she had in the post. I can't even make this stuff up. She has since switched them out with fully clothed versions instead. But the hypocrisy remains. How is it any worse for a girl to stick out her boobs and do a "red carpet pose" than it is for her own sons to flex their muscles and pose for the camera half dressed? Why are adults so afraid that these evil dominatrix 14 year old vixens will spoil the perfectly proper and innocent minds of their 14 year old male counterparts?  Let's get real here, they're all the same, they're all doing the same exact things. Boy or girl, they're just teenagers trying to be noticed and trying to show off their new adult bodies. They're proud of them, and why shouldn't they be? What's so wrong with embracing our bodies? Why are we always trying to shame our girls? Hey you, 14 year old girls... your boobs are perfect. Good for you! (If anything I'm just jealous.)

So if teenagers are all the same then why are the girls always to blame? How about each person is responsible for their own morality, and how about trusting your sons just a little and not policing every piece of media they will ever encounter? Do you think blocking these girls from their facebook feeds will block them from their lives? They'll still be in chemistry class monday morning, Mrs. Hall. They will still all be proud owners of their brand new adult bodies so let's start treating them like adults even just a little. Let's teach our sons that girls may dress however they want to dress  and it is not up to the girls to dress and act and look however the boys need them to dress and act and look so they won't be viewed in a sexual way. And  sons, even if you have to look at a million pictures of your scantily clad peers you are still expected to treat each and every one of them like a person. Do you think you can do that? I believe in you! And I think you shouldn't blame your thoughts and feelings and behaviors on anyone but yourself.

Instead of keeping our boys from seeing anything that they can't "easily un-see" let's let them face those challenges and help them navigate this rocky teenage period of self discovery with compassion and understanding. Let them learn from these challenges and let these experiences form them into mature, respectful men. Keeping them away from photos and posts is just babysitting their morality for them. Let them stand up and own it. Let them be responsible and be expected to act with integrity no matter what situation they are in. Stop babying them. Stop being so afraid. Teenage sexuality is not inherently evil, so please let's not make it out to be.

Two other links I love that relate...

slut shaming

a letter to a daughter from her father

The Western Peninsula

To the northwest of Reykjavik is a little peninsula jutting off the Icelandic coast called Snaefellsnes. It's sometimes called "little Iceland" because here on this small stretch of land you can see just about every different landscape the island has to offer. We spent our first full day in Iceland here, navigating the entirety of the coast in our tiny rental. We ate lobster pasta in the traditional fishing village of Stykkishólmur in the quaintest little seaside restaurant you ever did see. We found a trio of wild ponies, excuse me, regal and majestic HORSES (Icelanders don't like it when you call them ponies. They are a highly respected national treasure, dammit.) grazing off the roadside and they let me whisper quiet professions of love in their ears and stroke their velvety noses.

Peak life experience.

 

 

We found the black pebble beach of Djúpalónssandur, which, at a minimum, took my breath away and at a maximum, changed my life forever. I have never seen such a place, and these pictures hardly do it justice. It was like a fairy tale come to life and made me realize why, when asked, only 10% of Icelanders believe with absolute certainty that elves do not exist. Which means (if my math serves me) the other 90%, well, they believe in the possibility. If you lived in a place like this, wouldn't you too?  

 

 

I swear to you I saw what could only be a fairy glen on the other side of this hole. I didn't see any actual fairies, but I'm 90% certain they were just hiding.

 

 

No sand, just smooth, black pebbles as far as the eye can see.

 

 

We also drove through the Berserk lava fields which, I mean...

 

 

We had to drag ourselves away. Also, Icelandic farmers wrap their hay bales in white plastic to protect them from the elements, which results in what looks to be giant marshmallow fields all along the roadside. Don't you agree? Once you see it, you can't un-see it and then you just giggle and giggle the rest of the day. 

 

 

We also found the cave at Rauðarfellsgjá which was the inspiration for Jules Verne’s novel “A Journey to the Centre of the Earth” and now I see why. I wish the photos could appropriately convey the enormity of this place. Maybe below you can see those two teeeeeny tiny white specks at the mouth of the cave? Those are people. Two full grown adults actually, so yeah. It was magnificent and totally Game of Thrones-ish. Which by the way, have I mentioned they were shooting GOT on location in Iceland while we were there and we saw the whole set up by complete accident one night as we were driving along the south coast? Because we totally did. And it was awesome and Josh and I white people high-fived and everything.

 

Oh, and then there was this old thing. Just a little fishing hamlet known as Arnarstapi on the southern side of Snæfellsjökull national park with the most exquisite coastline I've ever seen. Full of sea birds nesting in it's cliffs and cozy little cottages roosting in it's hills. Because people live here. I mean, I live in Wadsworth, Ohio and some people live here, it's nbd. Elves and fairies live here too, so why not. And while we're on the subject I would also like to propose the existence of mermaids as well to complete the trifecta of mythological beings, if you will. Because if this place can exist, than surely mermaids must certainly exist to occupy it. There's no way such a place would be created without mermaids to inhabit it. That would just be a waste. I mean seriously, don't be silly.