The Last Day/The First Day

yes ever, you can expect things like this from me for the rest of your life. your mom is a dork.

Today is my last day of maternity leave. Lord, how I've been dreading that sentence. Three kids in and it never gets easier, does it? I'm not going to get too deep with this post because if I think about it too much I'll dissolve into a stomach churning puddle of tears. And I need to actually be a functioning grown up tomorrow and put on not pajamas and go into work with other adults and design stuff, I guess. So let's keep it light, shall we?

Things I thought I would do while on Maternity Leave vs. what I actually did:

• I planned on reading Anna Karenina. lol, no. Like I was actually going to read Tolstoy in between nursing sessions and diaper changes. Am I new? I have no idea how I thought I'd read a 900 page book while taking care of an infant. I actually listened to lots of books on Audible (hands free!) Book reviews coming up shortly. 
• I thought I'd get some painting done around the house. Lord knows there are plenty of rooms that still need it. Again, I was obviously smoking something. Was I actually going to put my new baby down so I could paint some dumb walls and squander away those precious hours of her tiny newness? Nooooope. The walls aren't going anywhere but as they say, babies don't keep. What I actually did was just stare at the baby all day.
• I expected to be dealing with colic again. This is the happiest bullet point by the way, because I'm not! After back to back babies with colic I was totally geared up for it. But the weeks went by waiting for the other shoe to drop and...nothing. Sure, she gets fussy and cries sometimes, all babies do. But I know colic, I've LIVED colic and this ain't it. So many gold stars, baby girl. You're the best.
• I thought I would get to lounge around watching Netflix all day and maybe catch up on some of the tv series that I've been meaning to watch. Um, no. You know what maternity leave is when you've got two other kids? It's basically just regular life but with stitches and bigger boobs. Meaning I was up and down all day with school pick ups and drop offs, making snacks and wiping butts. Oh, and the only thing on tv was the Wild Kratts.
• I thought I'd get around to organizing the basement/sorting through clothes for Goodwill/finishing a million other little projects around the house. Yeah, no didn't do any of that either. What I DID do however was finish Ever's bedroom! I wasn't about to pick up a paint brush or tackle something new but oh how I miraculously found plenty of time to get online and order all of the things. Designing a little girl's room has been so much fun, gah! Post coming soon.

So basically, what I'm saying is I didn't accomplish a whole lot. But I did spend nearly every moment possible soaking up that precious time with my delicious baby girl. I love her to the moon, you guys, and tomorrow and all the days after that where I have to be away from her are going to be rough. We'll adjust, we have to. It's just the first of many in an endless chain of life changes we will face. And I'm lucky to know that when I can't be with her she will be in the loving and capable hands of people I trust. But, if you can keep me in mind tomorrow and send some positive vibes my way, I'd sure appreciate it. I'll take all the good juju I can get. I am going to miss her.